ABOUT US

My name's T.K. I used to run an antiques store with my ex-wife until my cats broke everything that was worth anything. Including my marriage. Now I'm trying to get by by selling anything they like to play with.

The cats are not for sale.

If you see my ex-wife will you have her call me. She's not returning my calls for some reason and there's some stuff here I think she needs or might want. Also I should tell her about some bloodwork. NOT THE CATS. MY BLOOD WORK.

THE CATS

I'M TANGO

I eat bugs even when I'm not hungry. Once I ate a snake. Sometimes I whisper in T.K.'s ear about where secret treasures are hidden but when he rents a backhoe to look for them nothing's there.

I'M OMEN

I hate mice. I hate T.K.'s ex-wife. Sometimes I'll scratch out patterns in the litter to tell T.K. about what the end of days will look like when the Lord of Death will reap what he hath sowed.

I'M GLORP

I love television. I've seen every episode of Cops. I have to be fed by hand piece by piece because I refuse to leave my seat. I tell T.K. how a cabal of elders is controlling the world through the news.