Would you like to advertise with us? Get that satchel of cash ready.
Just like your small business we cover the Everglades like no one else. We're the voice that locals trust so you should trust us with your advertising campaign.
From letting our readers know about the rich fresh produce of 'Crumbler Farms' to the delicate smells of the candles at 'I Scents Things' dozens of Fakahatchee's finest businesses entrust us with their advertising every day so there's really no need for you to be such a pussy about it. What are you afraid of? Big Chicken. Big chicken afraid to advertise with the Fakahatchee Gazette? Why don't you eat some grain, you giant chicken? I've got a handful of corn that I'm sprinkling for you. Buck buck bawk! Shit. Now we're imagining a big chicken and if it was like really big that would be terrifying. Like a building sized chicken. Ugh. We're not gonna sleep tonight.
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